Going from 0 to 60 seems like the skill we all want to learn. But sometimes life forces us to go from 60 to zero… to slam on the brakes and change course in order to succeed. This is the second of a three-part blog.
There are a million books and business professionals to teach you how to go from Zero to 60. But what happens when your life changes on a dime and you have to go from 60 to Zero? This is the first of a three-part video blog on ramping down when you are facing stress, change, or challenge.
The year 2014 seems to be the year of putting everything to the test. Tests and quizzes only used to be found in the back of Cosmo magazine, but these days the Internet is rife with tests of “what 80s rock song is your anthem?” and “which Real House Wife diva are you most like.”
I admit to being tempted every once in awhile to figure out what animal I was in a past life, but mostly I avoid those tests. Today, however, I stumbled upon a quiz I just HAD to take: The 14 question Resilience Measurement Scale. How resilient am I REALLY?
It turns out, I scored a “moderately high” 86, which the test interprets to mean that I find life meaningful and am rarely depressed. (True.) I wonder what it would have taken to score off the charts. Some of the questions, to be honest, I was surprised to see, because they don’t correlate to resilience in an obvious way. For example, I didn’t score myself particularly high on “I have self-discipline.” I can see what self-discipline has to do with bouncing back in the face of challenge, but it wouldn’t be one of the FIRST 14 measures of resilience I might think of. Interesting.
Another sort of surprising question was “I keep interested in things,” (which I DID score myself highly on.) Having both broad and deep interests in life is something that can help make us more resilient, but again, I wouldn’t necessary think of it as one of the top measures of resilience. Finally, I was surprised by the question about whether or not I am within 5 pounds of my goal weight (shocking news: I’m not!) Does weight have anything to do with resilience? Or is it about the ability to set and reach a goal? I assume that it’s the latter, but I would be interested in knowing more about why the ask that specific question, rather than a general question about goal achievement.
If you are interested in measuring your own resilience, I highly recommend the 14 Question Scale. It’s very quick, and will give you a nice overview of your strengths and opportunities when it comes to besting a challenge. Particularly if you are in a tough moment in your life or work, why not take a few minutes and measure how well you can expect to cope?
-Courtney
It’s easy to forget sometimes the old saying that “everyone you meet is fighting their own battle.” Here’s a moment recently where I was reminded of that.
We spend most of our time in a world of absolutes: what is, IS, and what isn’t, ISN’T. We believe what we can see and measure. The apple is either red, or it is not red.
But the truth may not be the truth, in some cases. I was reading a study out of Sweden about how how scientists were, in a sense, “tricking” people’s brains to change their perception by using stimulus from other senses to confuse whatever sense was being tested. For example, the test subjects were tricked into sensing that a sound originated from a certain area because a light briefly and subtly flashed on that area, so they subconsciously focused on the light, and assumed the sound came from there. The scientists discovered that just because we perceive something as being absolutely, tangibly true, it may not be reality. What is “real” can change by what we perceive.
I thought this idea had merit, so I set out to test it in my own life. See, I’ve been hearing myself a lot lately say, “Oh, man, I’m soooooo busy.” Usually when I say that, the person I’m addressing responds, “Me toooooo. Things are so craaaaaazy lately.” I decided to do a little experiment. I stopped saying “I’m so busy,” when someone asks me how I’m doing. I tell them that I’m doing great, that I just booked a new client or I’m working on something exciting for a volunteer committee I’m on. If something is bothering me, I’ll say it.
But for a few days, I stopped saying “I’m sooooooooooo busy.”
Guess what happened?
I didn’t feel quite so busy. I felt, in fact, significantly less frazzled. My calendar is just as booked – in fact, I chose to do this at a time when my calendar is arguably MORE booked than it has been in months! But I don’t FEEL so busy. I’m not focusing on the busy, I’m not talking about the busy, so the busy is minimized in my life.
Could the busy stand to be minimized in your life? Is there something bothering you or stressing you out that would be nice to have its importance shrunk down just a little bit? If so, try your own experiment like mine, thanks to the scientists in Sweden. If you aren’t busy focusing on how you are sooooooooo busy or soooooooo whatever, I promise you’ll feel less “whatever”. Put your focus elsewhere, and watch how your perception of the issue changes.
-Courtney
